Description
やしろあずきがインターネットで描いている漫画をまとめてこう…こうしてこうやってまとめたお得なまとめ本です！
Dialogue in this work
Page 1
- The Tragedy of Halloween Night
- Before Halloween, when I was a kid.
- This year, I'm going all out with my costume!
- Alright!!
- I'm gonna rip up a sheet from our house, smear my mom's lipstick on it, and make a blood-soaked cape...!!
- Uh... You're gonna get in so much trouble for that.
- It's Halloween, so it'll be fine! (Weird logic)
Page 2
- Alright!! It's ripped! Now to smear it all over!
- Yeah! Now to make the bloodstains...
- That day, we learned something.
- Ah... Mom...
- That humans are scarier than any ghost.
- Run for it! The window, the window!
Page 3
- A Mother's "Strategy" During Child-Rearing
- Oh dear! You've got quite the nosebleed there!
- Waaaaaah! Mooooom!
- It's no use! I'm going to die!
- You're kidding, right?! You're gonna die?
- I promise you, I'm dying!! In about 10 seconds!!
- In 10 seconds?!
Page 4
- Before I die, I'd like you to finish your homework for me.
- I'll do it!!
- And I'd like you to clean your room, too!!
- I'll do it!!
- And if you could also tidy up your desk, I could die with no regrets.
- I already did it.
- Is that so?! Well then, I'm all better!!
- I fell for that trick about three times.
- You're better?! Hooray!!
Page 5
- My room at my parents' house had a lock, but there was a small window above the door.
- My mother would sometimes peek in from there.
- Old Hag
- So I hung an old, unused dress shirt on the door.
- Alright... This should do it...
- I executed my plan to block the small window.
Page 6
- A few days later.
- Phew, I'm beat.
- Alright, time to play some eroge...
- W... Wha— Whaaaaaaah!
- It's the old hag!
- From then on, I used a brand-new dress shirt.
Page 7
- When You Argue, It's Good to Do XX
- When an argument was about to start...
- You stupid son!
- Shut up, you old hag!
- Ah, wait!! From now on, we're only speaking English!!
- Huh?! O... Okay!! Uh... FUCK YOU!!
Page 8
- HEY YOU ARE FOOL!! YOU... DIE!! YOU DESTROY!! GO TO... DIE!! DIE!! DEMON EAT!!
- KILL!! YOU DIE!! VERY DIE!! YOU DEAD!! I'M GOD!! YOU... VERY DEAD!!
- If you make a rule to only speak English to each other during arguments...
- SHUT UP DIE!! YOU... BUFFO!
- I'M YOU KILL!! FUFUFU...!!
- ...before you know it, the insults turn into laughter, and you can reach a peaceful resolution.
- Only applies to families who are bad at English.
Page 9
- The Result of Catching "High-Consciousness" Sickness
- Around my second year of college, I developed a habit of using English buzzwords without really knowing what they meant.
- Commitment!!
- So cool!!
- Yes, it's the second phase of chuunibyou... I call it "dainibyou."
- Hey Mom, by the way, is there any problem with the upcoming agenda? Are you able to commit?
- What's that? Adidas?
- Whaaat? You don't know? Your consciousness is, like, so low, isn't it?
Page 10
- Later...
- I'm beat... I'm home.
- Welcome home!! I have a buffer today, so I had a flash idea. Is it okay if we finalize dinner as curry?
- Wh-?! What...?!
- I studied up just so I could keep up with your "woke" attitude!!
- Is there any particular issue with assigning fukujinzuke to the curry? If we have a consensus, then ASAP!!
- I was wrong! Please go back to normal!
- ① Paraphrased: Welcome home. I have some extra time today, so I had an idea. Is it okay if we just have curry for dinner? ② Paraphrased: Is there any problem with adding fukujinzuke to the curry? If not, I'll make it right away.
Page 11
- Taking a Day Off for Your Mental Health Isn't Cheating
- Back in the day, I tended to skip school quite a bit.
- Ugh... I wanna skip school today...
- What is it?! If it's about that dirty magazine I found yesterday, I'll pretend I never saw it!!
- Just kill me.
- No... Actually, I messed up a bit during a class presentation... and everyone's been teasing me about it, so it's been a little tough...
- I see!! You have my permission to rest!!
- Huh?! It's okay for me to play hooky?!
Page 12
- What are you talking about?! Even if you don't have a cold, when your heart is hurting, it's the same as being sick!!
- When something tough happens, it's necessary to rest your heart at home!! You can't call that playing hooky!!
- When something truly difficult happens, it's important not to push yourself and to take a rest.
- Oh... thank you... Well then, I'll just relax and play some video games...
- You're going to die in 5 seconds!!
- I'll do my homework, too.
Page 13
- So, thanks to the fact that "when my heart is hurting" was excluded from my mom's definition of "playing hooky," I was saved quite a few times.
- You skipped school to play online games at an internet cafe, didn't you?
- But if I actually played hooky, she'd get super mad.
- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Page 14
- Taking a Break ≠ Slacking Off, Right?
- I've had a habit of slacking off ever since I was a kid.
- My homework's not done, so I'll just play some games for a bit, lol.
- Gyaaaah! Mom! I'm finished! I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Just spare my life!
- ...You're going to finish your homework, right? Then it's fine!
- Huh?!
Page 15
- As long as you can get it done properly, slacking off and taking a short break are pretty much the same thing.
- I'll just rest...
- You could see it as slacking off, or you could see it as taking a break.
- On the contrary, it's impossible for a human to stay focused forever! The trick to living well is to slack off in moderation while you make progress.
- But the kind of slacking off that ends up inconveniencing other people is not okay!
- Hmm... but it's hard to judge whether my slacking off will inconvenience someone or not...
- That's true... Try opening this bento for your middle school lunch tomorrow.
Page 16
- Ooh! Mom's masterpiece bento! What's inside...?
- This is the kind of slacking off that inconveniences people.
- I understand... peeeerfectly.
Page 17
- The Result of Being Asked to Run an Errand with New Year's Cards
- One year-end during my boyhood.
- If you're going to mail your New Year's cards, I'd like you to mail mine, too.
- OK, leave it to me!
- Then, a few days after the new year began...
- Huh...? There's something in my bag...
- ...ro...
- To: Mongolian Death Saburo
Page 18
- Oh craaaaaap! I only mailed my own cards back then and forgot to send Mom's!
- I'm looking forward to getting replies.
- This is seriously bad. What do I do? Should I just be honest and tell her?
- Hey, uh, what would you do if I, like, forgot to mail the New Year's cards? Hahaha.
- I'll bury you.
- I can't tell her.
Page 19
- And so, Yashiro thought. He wracked his non-existent brain, trying to figure out how to overcome this crisis.
- And thus, he came up with a solution.
- The next day...
- Mom... A New Year's card for you arrived! Look... Heh heh heh...
- Thanks!! You look pale as a ghost.
Page 20
- Huh... They all seem to be written in the same handwriting.
- N-No, see, it's just a sign of the times, you know?
- Your life ends this month.
- I'm sorry.
Page 21
- My Mother and the Arcade's "Hockey Game"
- Partly because I was an only child, when I was a kid...
- Yep, an iron wall.
- A hated technique where you endlessly move your hand in front of the goal to block your opponent's attacks.
- That's cheating, you old hag!
- ...I would sometimes go play at the arcade with my mother.
- Around that time, there was one game I was totally hooked on.
- The zombie shooter, The House of the Dead.
- I even bought the Dreamcast version.
Page 22
- We'd play it together, but of course, being more used to games, I was better at it...
- Ah, you got hit.
- And that's game over for you, Mom.
- And to make matters worse, kids are creatures who love to taunt you at times like these.
- Aww, dying in a place like this? You're so weeeeak!
- So weeeeak... Totally pathetic... lol
Page 23
- The day after I taunted her relentlessly, we were back at the arcade.
- Alright, let's shoot some zombies today, too!
- Fine! Let's do it!
- Look! You're supposed to aim for that one's head.
- Leave it to your mother.
- Whoa...? Hey, you're not half bad.
Page 24
- Okay, shoot the lever on the right here to change the route! Hurry up and shoot it!
- Uh... y-yeah...
- Okay, save that researcher! Life +1!
- Th... This woman...
- Huh? What's wrong? Your score is low.
- Aren't you a little weak? Hmm?
Page 25
- A Story About "Faking Sick" as a Kid
- Ever since elementary school, I faked being sick to skip school quite a bit.
- You just hold a thermometer up to the stove just right... and fake a fever.
- Yamauchi, the Genius of Faking Sick
- But if you mess up the timing and pull it away too late, you get a super high fever and get caught instead...?
- Whoa... As expected of Yamauchi...!
- But I faked sick so often that my mother started taking countermeasures.
- Aaargh, I feel so sick... My condition is, like, terrible... *cough* I feel like I'm gonna die... *cough*
- You look terribly pale. No, you're staying home from school today.
- Ah... You...!!
Page 26
- What's with that pale face...?! A serious illness... Death... You're dying!!
- Whaaat?!
- This is terrible!! I'm calling the fire department and the police right now!!
- Th-The police...?! Wait!
- Hello, police? My son is gravely ill...
- HEY HEY HEY STOP! Wait, wait, just wait! I'm fine, seriously!
- Because I'm faking it.
- I know!! Now sit there properly!!
Page 27
- The Time I Ran Away From Home
- I ran away from home when I was a kid.
- Is that so? Good luck!!
- I can't take this anymore! I'm leaving home!
- You hear me?! I'm leaving the house!! You hear?!
- Is that so? Good luck!!
- Are you okay...? He's gone...
- Oh... Don't you worry.
- Because I have a secret weapon...
Page 28
- A few hours later, nearby.
- Damn it... I'm never going back home...
- ...Hm? Is that...
- Mom?!
- What do you want? It's too late now. I'm never coming back.
- Say something! Hey... Hey...!!
Page 29
- The name of Tatsuyuki Yanagiya's first crush is... N.
- ?!
- I'm not taking this sign off until you catch me! Ho ho ho ho!
- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah, you old haaaaaaaaaag!
Page 30
- The Story of the "Bath Time War" at My Parents' House
- When I lived at home, the order for taking baths was set, starting with my grandmother.
- The bath is ready.
- Alright! First bath!
- Hey, you brat!
- ...But I basically never followed that rule.
- Good grief... What am I to do? Is there any good way to handle this...?
- I have no choice but to snuff him out.
- I have no choice but to snuff him out.
- That's it... I'll use this cell phone with its video recording function...
Page 31
- A few days later.
- The bath is ready.
- Whoo-hoo! First bath is all mine!!
- Yes, got it! The bathtub is the best... Ah, it's cold!
- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! This isn't a hot bath! What the—?!
Page 32
- You fell for it!! I recorded the sound of the bath being ready on my phone and played it at full volume!!
- Now, surrender the bath!!
- The bath is ready.
- Damn it... I'll get you for this...!
- After this, I used the exact same method to get back at her, and our entire family became unable to trust automated voices ever again.
Page 33
- Adults Aren't Always Right
- Childhood
- My homeroom teacher and my gym teacher were saying completely different things, and I was super confused.
- Is that so?!
- Think for yourself!!
- Whaaat?!
- Adults aren't some kind of absolutely correct beings, you know!! I'm sure I've said plenty of wrong things myself!!
- For example, the other day, I said a ghost broke your ballpoint pen, but that was wrong. I actually stepped on it. Sorry.
- That's just a lie!
Page 34
- So, you see, 'think for yourself' doesn't mean you just ignore what adults say. It means you don't just blindly accept it. You take your own thoughts into account and come to your own conclusion!!
- If it seems like you're wrong, I'll tell you. And conversely, if it seems like I'm wrong, it'd be a big help if you'd tell me.
- I-I see... I get it.
- Well then!! You told me it was bad to draw on the wall with lipstick!!
- But the other day, I told my art teacher, and he said, 'That's artistic!' So it must be the right thing to do after all!
- I'm right! Get out here!!
Page 35
- The Story of When My Mom Was a Sorceress
- My room at my parents' house had a lock on it,
- Alright...!!
- and I'd use it when I was secretly playing games late at night.
- Alright, time to play some games...
- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! It's the old haaaaaag!
Page 36
- How did you open the lock?
- It's magic!!
- Magic?!
- I'm a sorceress, you see!!
- If you're scared of magic, then you shouldn't lock your door from now on!!
- Or I'll have to use my death magic!!
- Hieeeeeee!
- She had just pried it open with her fingernail, but I thought her educational method was quite clever.
Page 37
- The Story of the Parent-Teacher Association's Attraction
- When I was in elementary school, the PTA would put on a haunted house every year.
- DEATH
- The roles of the ghosts were played by the students' parents.
- Being the mischievous kids we were, there was one time we barged in before it opened.
- Hahaha! Chaaaaarge!
- Hey, wait!
Page 38
- Ooh... Looks like something's gonna pop out...
- I wonder if we'll get in trouble...
- What are you doing?! We haven't opened yet!!
- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! So scaaaaary!
- The scariest thing in the haunted house was my own mother appearing in her natural state.
Page 39
- The Story of When I Moved Out of My Parents' House
- After I moved out, I had a video call with my mother.
- Make sure you eat your vegetables!!
- Always keep medicine on hand!! And always keep a weapon by your pillow!!
- A... a weapon...? Why...?
- No matter what, a parent is a parent...
Page 40
- Also, all those erotic doujinshi you left in your room...
- I was thinking of sending them to our relative, Yasu. That's okay with you, right?!
- That's not okay at all!! Stop!!
- I already got the OK from Yasu!!
- You've gotta be kidding me, Yasu?! (It was a lie.)
Page 41
- My Mom's and My 'Game Hiding War'
- When I tried to secretly play video games as a kid.
- My homework's not done, but I really wanna play some Mario...
- It'll be fine if I just play secretly... Heh heh...
- Ah... Damn it, there's no power cord.
- That mother of mine... She must have anticipated this and hidden it! Damn her!
Page 42
- But usually, at times like this, it's up high in the storage closet...
- There it iiiiis! Gotchaaaa!
- Ah... Crap, now that thing is missing... you know, that thing.
- You know, the three red, white, and yellow things.
- The red, white, and yellow things you connect to the TV... What are they called? I don't know the name.
Page 43
- 30 minutes later.
- Haaah... Finally found those three things... I'm beat.
- Umm... now for the other thing... the game... where's the game...?
- Right here.
- Ah, Mom.
Page 44
- Well then, I suppose I'll go sell this at the game store.
- I did this every time, so I lost a lot of weight.
Page 45
- 'How to Stop a Child from Crying'
- When I was a kid and would throw a huge crying fit,
- Waaaaaaaah! I wanna go to Toys 'R' Us! Waaaaaaaah!
- Hello Mac!!
- Toys 'R' Us.
- something my mother would occasionally do instead of just trying to soothe me.
- She would cry, too.
- Waaaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaah! Gyaaaah!
- Waaah!
Page 46
- I'm so tired, toooo! From morning till night, making food for the family, cleaning the house, it's too much! Gyaaaaaah!
- And on top of that, my son won't stop crying! It's seriously too much! Gyaaaaan!
- By doing this,
- What's with this person... She's scary... I'm gonna stay away...
- I have a memory of calming down and stopping crying because of this.
Page 47
- However!! This was just my case. It's not guaranteed to make every child stop crying, and there were times it didn't work on me either!!
- I'm home...
- And in the cases where I didn't stop crying...
- Aaaaaaaaaah! Gyaaaaaaah! I can't take it anymooooore!
- Aaaaaaaaaah! Toys 'R' Us! Aaaaaaaaaah! Tamagotchi-iiii!
Page 48
- My father later told me that my mother and I would both scream and cry until we were exhausted, turning the house into a zoo.
- Dad's just gonna go eat out for a bit.
- RISKYYYYY!!
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